Why don’t you get a boyfriend? I’m sure if it was as easy as walking into a shop and buying a chocolate bar then everyone would have one but in this generation it’s not as easy as that. I have come up with 40 thoughts on why I think dating in this generation is a lot harder for us singletons.
1. Do they really like you or are they just bored and need entertaining?
2. The person who appears to care less has all the power, no one wants to be the one who’s more interested – which creates a push and pull effect resulting in mind games
3. Intentional long replies, reading and not replying or not clicking whatsapp for hours just to make a point that you’re ‘busy’ just to appear more mysterious
4. You constantly see your ex whether it’s through mutual friends, retweets or photos – you just can’t get away from them
5. If the one you have your eyes set on rejects you, a potential date could be round the corner seeing as everyone is both disposable and easily replaceable
6. There are way too many options – if one says no, the other says yes – so it’s not really seen as a big deal if the one you was potentially interested in isn’t available
7. Dating has become way too casual
8. Intimate moments have lost their intimacy down to social media sharing via Instagram, Twitter, Snapchat and Facebook
9. If someone is acting carefree you have to decide whether you think it’s because they have 0 interest in you or because they think you’re amazing and are consciously making more of an effort to ‘Playing it cool’ – leaving it up to you to guess which one
10. Are plans even plans? You can’t even get excited about a plan because one minute you could be hypothetically planning your future together and the next be complete strangers
11. The only difference between actions being romantic and cute rather than creepy and weird is all based on how attractive the other person finds you – if it’s attention from a guy you don’t like then yeah ‘creepy and stalkery’ comes to mind – It’s all down to your attraction towards them
12. ‘Lets chill’
13. The whatsapps, calls, facetimes, texts you sent, definitely went through. If there is a major delay in response I’m sorry to tell you that they are just purely ignoring you, 99% of the time our phones are in our hands, if we wanted to reply, we would have
14. Commitment-phobe – if we remain in a label free relationship then technically we can get all the benefits with no repercussions because that beautiful phrase ‘we were only seeing each other’ comes to play – HAVING YOUR CAKE AND EATING IT TOO is a very common relationship status these days
15. Social media creates endless temptations on cheating – everything is accessible and easily replaced – Social media is like a tasting menu – who haven’t we tried? who can we try next?
16. You don’t know if someone is being genuine or not – You technically don’t have anyone to answer to
17. The fear of being ‘MUGGED OFF’ – people are actually scared to put themselves out there – to reach out – in case it’s seen as too needy, too available, too anxious, too nice, too boring, etc.
18. Timing is key
19. Instead of expressing how you feel about the person in question you settle with a retweet, a photo in someone else’s words or a tweet about how you feel towards them – indirect and meaningless
20. People have 0 respect for people in relationships – meaning the temptation is always there
21. What you are and aren’t allowed to do is very blurred if you haven’t got a label on it – we’re seeing each other has many different rules and if you’re not together then technically you can both do as you please
22. Why work for it if you can get it somewhere else with less effort
23. Are you dating? Are you just having sex? Are you friends with benefits – who knows how exclusive the two of you are – blurred lines
24. If we aren’t exclusively dating then that means we can see other people right?
25. Not knowing whether you’re in a relationship can drag on for months – so that technically means you can date other people but what if the other finds out and then you ruin your chances of being with that person?
26. Who knows who you’re sharing each other with – you could be sleeping with various people all at the same time – but you’ll never know – because again – technically it isn’t cheating if you’re not together
27. It’s harder to enjoy because you don’t actually know where you stand – whether or not to get too emotionally attached – you end up being guarded and find yourself playing games
28. Are you actually into this person in question or are you just bored?
29. We date for the sake of dating rather than potentially trying to find someone to be with
30. Buying dinner is not always a one way ticket to sex – do what you feel is right, when it feels right, no weird rules – no one can judge it but you – if you want to have sex first date or the 90th that is entirely up to you – that’s if you can handle not jumping on each other by the 3rd
31. You shouldn’t judge your self-worth over whether someone did or didn’t text you back – get over it, move on, buy a fish
32. Stop taking everything too personally
33. If they make a habit of ignoring you and cancelling plans then just take it as a subtle hint that they aren’t interested
34. You don’t want to appear too desperate or too interested so you start doing this thing where you secretly are crazy about them but to them you’re cool as a cucumber
35. You must never assume the person you are sleeping with is only sleeping with you
36. We aren’t fans of making compromises as our ego and pride comes into play
37. When you send a message and they don’t reply, just wait until they do, don’t bombard them with messages in hope they’ll reply, they’ll probably run a mile
38. I personally think it’s crazy to have strict rules against sleeping with someone for a certain number of days – just do it whenever you feel you want to
39. The grass always seems greener on the other side
40. The fear of wasting your valuable time on someone who doesn’t value and respect you as a person